Why Music?

It's odd, really, why this question is asked so frequently of musicians and in turn, other artists about their individual arts.  We are constantly told throughout our lives that we should follow our dreams.  Let your dreams be your guide.  Go with your heart.  And so on.  Yet people are always surprised when they are confronted with someone who actually did follow their dreams, or are at least on the path headed in that direction.  The level of surprise can be rather disheartening to observe from the perspective of someone who is holding on to their dreams as though their very life depends on it.  The world is full of people in all walks of life who are haunted by their broken dreams that never came to fruition, whether by their own choices or a forced departure from their plans by external means.

I think that this is the primary reason why I stubbornly hold on to my music for dear life.  All too often, I see friends give up and move on to another field simply because they have to pay the rent.  It was one of the most heartbreaking decisions I myself had to make when student loan payments came knocking at the door.  I work for a wonderful company with fantastic co-workers and supervisors, but I am fully aware that it is simply a means to an end.  I recently went through a series of graduate school auditions for DMA programs, and each audition panel asked the same question, "Why do you want to pursue a DMA?"  Out of all of the questions that I was asked in my interviews, this was by far the easiest to answer.  It required absolutely no contemplation on my part to answer truthfully, "I have a great job that pays well, and I can easily get up every morning and go to work.  But I will never be able to move on, I will never be able to settle for something else, until I know that I have done absolutely everything in my power to get where I truly want to be with my playing.  As of right now, I haven't even come close."

Music is a beautiful, emotional, moving, heartbreaking, frustrating, time consuming,  wonderful field.  Yes, money is what pays the bills, and no, you will not be swimming in cash pursuing a career as a musician.  It's hard to explain why we put up with incredible physical and mental pain caused directly by an inanimate object (i.e. instrument) and why we actually love spending every free second we have closeted in a tiny practice room with that same inanimate object.  For me, there is nothing in this world that can possibly top the feeling of pure bliss that results from knowing that you have not given up on yourself.  The rest of the world may think you're insane for pursuing an art that will rarely make you rich and famous.  Your non-musician friends and family may rarely understand your motives or your drive.  These opinions will never matter.  The only thing that matters is that you know that you did not compromise your dreams and your soul will never have to feel as though a piece of it is missing.